7 ways to respond when someone tries to invalidate your feelings

7 Ways to Respond When Someone Tries to Invalidate Your Feelings

1.You're overreacting

RESPONSE

"What I feel is real and valid even if you

may not think so or "My feelings are based on my internal experience of the situation. You may disagree with how I feel and that's okay."

2.Just calm down. There is no need to get this worked up.

RESPONSE

"Please don't tell me how to feel."

3.I was just joking! Don't be so sensitive

RESPONSE

"Your joke was in bad taste and it hurt my feelings. I value what you have to say and if you say something mean or inconsiderate to me, I have a right to tell you how it affected me."

4.You're Crazy/You're imagining things

RESPONSE

"You saying that does not suddenly change my perception. It just shuts down the conversation."

5.It doesn't mean anything/There is no pattern

RESPONSE

"You saying that does not change how I view this situation. I am noticing something that is bothering me and I would appreciate if you can work with me to resolve this."

6.I know exactly how you feel. I went through something similar.

RESPONSE

"I am sorry you went through that."

This one is tricky to respond to because often the speaker shares a tough personal experience. However, this statement can be problematic because it steers the focus away from the person in distress and towards the speaker. It can feel dismissive and requires the individual in distress to find the capacity to empathize and support.

7.I am sure it was not that bad/ It could be worse.

RESPONSE

"Please let me feel what I feel. The last thing I want right now is to be guilted into feeling ungrateful."

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Throwing it back to this post on how to communicate when someone invalidates you. I think many of us can benefit from revising this from time to time.

Invalidating the feelings of a person sends the message that their thoughts and emotions are not important or valid. It makes one feel dismissed and rejected. This is an insidious form of emotional abuse that can leave the person fraught with self-doubt.

Emotional invalidation can be difficult to respond to, especially when the speaker is trying to support and mean well. They may not be consciously trying to minimize your feelings but it is important to stand up for yourself when you feel dismissed. The statements in this post can help with this.

How do you respond when someone invalidates your feelings?

Please use this information as a guide. Some of this information may not be relevant to your situation.

Also, these conversations are best when done in relationships you want to maintain.

Take care of your mind and body.

Love

Arputha Jayanthi

#psychology #psychologist #mentalhealthsupport